Friday, October 31, 2008

I like to call my favorite genre, "bubble gum for the mind."

I thought this would be a good post....here is my profile from GoodReads.com.

"I'm not a very good reader...I much prefer being out of doors..." -- Charles Bingley from Pride and Prejudice.

In a nutshell, I read when I can (which means on vacation). It's not that I don't enjoy it, I just keep myself too busy during the day, and reading at night puts me to sleep after the first few graphs. But when I have the time, I cram as many books in as I can.

I've never joined a book club, but I think the books I prefer would fall into the "book club" category, if that makes sense. I'm a huge fan of Jane Austen and recently read a sequel to Pride and Prejudice, which some fans might find absurd. But I'm not a snob about it and really enjoyed learning more about the lives of my favorite characters Darcy and Lizzie after the engagement. (I love the book so much that I named my dog Lizzie!)

I'm not an exceptional reviewer or critic - I tend to like almost everything I pick up. No matter what it is, I'm able to relate somehow to the characters or their stories. I don't generally read non-fiction but have enjoyed a few books about Buddhism (the philosophy more than the religion). One problem I have is I'm unable to retain the stories I read.... I can say "Oh, I read that!" but if anyone asks about the plot or characters, I'm likely to answer with "Ummmmmmm...." Seriously, what's up with that!

Currently listening to: nothing.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Are blogs vain?

I have roughly 10 web-logs bookmarked on my computer and only visit about 3 of them when I’m randomly surfing the internet (do people say that anymore?). I know some people who are addicted to reading about other people’s lives and other people who read blogs to seek out opinions on hot button issues. My blog-reading tendencies are random at best.

The people who keep blogs are either updating on the progress of children, themselves, politics or just progress on that particular day. I know one dude who has to keep a public blog for his techy-job, which is kind of neat but also scary. The reason I started mine was b/c I often have random irrelevant thoughts that I sometimes forget to share with real people. So I figured I’d write them down. My one question in this process is…. Are blogs vain? Why do we want people to know about our progress or our casual thoughts? And if no one is reading your blog, like mine, what does it matter?

I don’t really know how to answer that question, but I will say that after five months of not posting, I re-read my blog and was completely amazed at what I wrote and how I wrote it. And it wasn’t because I’m a spectacular wordsmith. I read it almost objectively as if it was someone else, because I had forgotten – only three months ago – my state of …well, everything. What was going on in my head that day? What was my mood? It reminds me of a book I just read called The Unbearable Lightness of Being. Does that mood even matter now? I read the blog and thought…”awww, look at that.” As Milan Kundera wrote, “In the sunset of dissolution, everything is illuminated by the aura of nostalgia, even the guillotine.”

Anyway, I’m starting to remember that part of the reason I started a blog is because I wanted to get started writing again. I love to write – I do it for a living for fuck’s sake. But writing for work is so different. It’s so…. formulaic. It’s so important for the lives we potentially save, but also so unimportant for my own life. It doesn’t define who I am or tell the stories that I might potentially have somewhere in my body. When I was young, I used to love writing and was pretty darn good at it. (I love to say that I won the writing award in front of the entire fifth grade class at Boone Elementary. Woot!) In high school and college, I continued writing creative pieces and short literary memoirs and I loved reareading them too! I’d like to think that a blog is just another, more efficient way of writing in this manner. But now, I don’t really have a good topic to write about, which is why it remains random, only updating the progress of anything.

Speaking of progress, in the beginning of 2008 I wrote down goals for my life. It is not a coincidence that it happened while I was reading a story in US News and World Report about New Year’s Resolutions. But I had decided that a resolution was too short-term and weak, only on a track to failure due to its intrinsic nature as a decision to do something, versus actually doing something. It is a wishful thought for the year ahead based on the month preceding it, and with minimal considerations from the years (plural) past, in my humble opinion. And once you resolve to do something and don’t do it, all you feel is guilt and defeat. (Damn you, cognitive dissonance!) In writing my goals, I decided to put bullets or notes under each one so that it put me on the right path not just resolving to do something generally, but getting there with an action plan to real change and for good. I like to think it has some substance.

(Side note: Does this count as a blog if its WAY too long?)

So here is my list of Goals for 2008 and a status on my progress (which I think is an attempt at highlighting my success to those who read the blog, which is no one, bringing me back to my point of being vain).

GOALS FOR 2008

1. Always find romance and happiness with Dax no matter what - take time to consider his physical needs - give him all the kisses in the world

Status: When I began writing goals, I thought: “This can’t only be about me. What is important in my life?” This was a sincere gesture to show my husband in his love language that I really truly love him, because I don’t in my right mind what to do anything, or not do anything, that would ever hurt him. Over the past few months, he’s commented on how much more “snuggly” I am with him, AND – much to our parents advantage -- our physical closeness has led us to consider having children sooner than I originally planned. And…I do love kissing him. J
2. Continue to work toward a healthier lifestyle - Prepare for and complete half marathon - continue bootcamp - see a Podiatrist - do yoga at home

Status: I did all of these things and will never do at least one again. I semi-trained for and completed the half marathon, but received my orthodic inserts from the podiatrist a week too late (duh!) I have never felt that sort of pain in my whole life and can only imagine it was as painful as having a baby. My feet were so messed up for days, but I finished and I clocked in at just after 2 hours alongside the winners of the actual marathon. My dad ran beside my during my last sprint, which I thought was super cute, but he got reprimanded by a cop/usher on duty. I love to run and will probably only compete in middle distance races from now on (10 milers sound about right.) As for yoga… I can only say that yoga is life. I do it twice a week at home and twice a week at the YMCA. Beyond yoga and for all the other sports and other physical activities I do, my mind is actually focusing on what my body is doing and it has a very calming affect on me. When I play volleyball, my eye is on the ball and I’m telling my teammates who is open. When I do push-ups, my hips are perfectly square and crown of my head is reaching forward. When I run, I tighten my lower abs for good posture and strengthening. When I swim, I focus on the placement of everything from the tips of my fingers to the tilt of my head. My breathe follows this intense focus and I am one with my body. J So, 25 pounds later that I’ve shed, I feel like I’m on the road to a healthier lifestyle. As far as boot camp goes, I did it for a while and stopped to let my body rest and took up swimming. I love it. I will start strength training again as it gets cooler.

3. Cook romantic dinners - eat fresh, organic foods - cut out junk food - reduce portions

Status: Check and Check. The only thing is instead of organic, replace that with “whole.” I do see some benefit to eating organic – there is a list out there with the most important things you could buy that are organic. But mostly, I changed my diet to include just more whole, fresh foods, meaning shopping in the produce sections for most of my groceries. I will say that it was really hard to cut out junk food and I do sort of “cheat” on the weekends. But I’m not on a diet, per se, so it’s not really cheating on anything. I just allow myself to indulge in some semi-fatty but delicious foods when we go out with friends on the weekends. It’s just so hard not to have cheese enchiladas when you go to Juan’s! The best way I was able to stay on track with this was through swimming. While I was running, I could eat junk food but with swimming, I felt every piece of bad trans fat. It hurt like hell so I stopped.

4. Enjoy nice weather at the park
Status: During the hot days, I visited my favorite water hole a few times. On the nicer days, I’ve scheduled at least two “Recess” parties for friends at the park. They were a huge it. And after I adopted the most wonderful dog in the world, it gave me a reason to enjoy the park even more.

5. Pamper my emotional and physical self - pay more attention to my body - do things that make me happy - find time each day to relax

Status: I’m starting to get tired of writing so I’m going to try to keep this short. This one is still in the works. Yoga and volleyball are contributing factors which makes it easy. I still wish I visited coffee shops more but I find that I also enjoy being a lone at home in my own coffee shop. J I have definitely begun to pay attention more to changes in my body, like freckles or weird rashes. LOL.

6. Get more involved in the community - volunteer with a local organization - belong to a professional or other membership organization - make an effort to meet new people

Status: This is not going so well. I tend to flake out on volunteer commitments and have just succumbed to the fact that maybe I am not that type of person – one who volunteers. I figure, if it doesn’t come naturally to me, why force it. There are other things in life that I can do to make a difference in this world. I did pay dues to a professional organization but I feel the same way about this as volunteering. I basically did it because it is a benefit provided by my employer, but I’m not involved in any way with the membership organization. Finally, meeting people is always hard but I recently did join a few meet-up groups and neighborhood list servs!

7. Build a Happy Home - try not to buy too much furniture but instead paint and do other cheap things - light candles because good scents can trigger happy times and happy memories - garden with joy

Status: Well, a new couch set and dresser drawer later….. These are the last major pieces we purchased and I did try! I am liking the way the house looks now and the only thing left is the paint, really. But committing to a color is to controversial in our household. Dax says grass green or purple, while I lean towards my default sage or a shade of khaki. Candles are too expensive these days so I haven’t really bought any and my mom hasn’t given any. So instead, I bought some really yummy sprays from Pier 1 and Bath and Body Works. The garden is looking good, I’ve looked at it again as a hobby and not a chore. We just planted a succulent garden in the front giving our Casa Cruzada some nice curb appeal. This also helped goal number six b/c I joined a gardening group in our neighborhood. Here is a photo of me at the free plant swap with the puppies! Puppies and Plants

8. Seize the Day! - create a routine that incorporates work, play and surprises

Status: This is really fun for me b/c I can say, 3 years after working from home, that I’ve incorporated these things. I play golf, go to the park or do yoga in between my productive work hours. Dax and I are going to Hawaii in a few weeks – it was an impulsive purchase because we found ridiculously cheap tickets from Houston for $257 each round trip. I can’t wait!

9. Right Mind

Status: I’ve been trying to incorporate my Buddhist philosophies back into my life. Breathing in, I smile, breathing out, I calm myself.


I will now end with a resolution (haha) I made in one of my last blog entries.

My Current Playlist:
Coldplay
Coldplay
Coldplay
Brazilian Melt
Interpol
B.R.M.C.